BODY THIEVES

Help Girls Reclaim Their Natural Bodies and Become Physically Active

2002: Salal Books, Vancouver, BC    ISBN# 0-9698883-3-3   264 pages  $19.95
 


The teenage girl comes bounding up the stairs, makes a beeline to my office and plunks herself down on the couch. Her smile and her energy fill the room. A year ago she lay in the hospital for the third time, anxiety soaring and weight plummeting as anorexia nervosa played havoc with her body and her mind. Today she is a normal feisty, pain-in-the-neck sixteen-year-old who is taking charge of her life.

Several hours later, a second girl trudges up the walkway. With her shoulders slumped she looks like she is carrying the weight of the world. And in a way she is. At eleven she is already dealing with society’s negative attitudes towards people who are fat. In our counseling sessions together we work on how she can fight back against the teasing she encounters daily, on how she can be fat with dignity, and how she can be healthy and make her body strong.  

These two girls represent the ends of the weight spectrum. There are thousands of others in between who, in varying degrees, struggle for ownership of their bodies and a sense of themselves. What they have in common is that they have all fallen victim to body thieves who hold them hostage to the bathroom scale, destroy their sense of self, and block them from getting on with their lives.

 

The body thieves are:

 
Society’s emphasis on thinness as a predominant measure of worth that robs girls of their ability to accept their natural bodies.

    


The silencing of girls’ voices, because as girls learn to distrust their own voices and experiences and knowledge, their bodies become the surrogate selves that speak in their place, too often telling tales of self-loathing.

    


Society’s attitudes and prejudices towards fat which girls internalize at an early age and which become entrenched as they mature.

    


Antifat crusaders who reinforce society’s belief that fat is bad and pressure us all to diet instead of encouraging us to be active and eat well and promote health for people of all shapes and sizes.

    


Dieting which robs girls of their natural bodies and puts them at risk for eating disorders, obesity and the medical consequences of constant weight-cycling.

    

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Women who diet and—as mothers and teachers and mentors—pass their weight loss practices and attitudes toward fat onto the girls they work with.


We are now in the midst of a societal health crisis around body image and body size. The number of girls with eating disorders is dramatically on the rise, the age of onset is going down and the number of boys with eating disorders and/or body image disturbances is increasing. At the same time that societal prejudice towards people who are fat is becoming more intense, opportunities for girls to use their bodies are diminishing as physical education is disappearing from the school curriculum or just not meeting the needs of girls.  

Whether you are a parent, teacher, concerned adult or older adolescent who works with girls, Body Thieves will provide you with the skills to fight the body thieves and in doing so help girls reclaim their natural bodies, become physically active and get on with their lives.  

Body Thieves is made up of fifteen chapters that cover different issues in girls’ lives. The first two chapters Gender and Development and Socialization address female development and what happens to girls in the process of growing up that diverts them away from developing their self-worth toward defining themselves by numbers on the bathroom scale. It provides the framework upon which the rest of the book is built. There is also information about boys so that you can understand the differences in development and culture.  

Building Relationships with Girls helps you develop or enhance your connection with the girls in your life. It teaches you about ‘schmoozing’—a communication ritual that allows you to get real with girls instead of talking at them.  

The War on Fat confronts the myths around obesity and lets you know how you can become a Size Acceptance Warrior and fight fat prejudice.  

The Deadly Quest to be Thin provides you with a context for eating disorders and helps you support girls who you consider to be at risk.  

When Girls are Fat looks at why girls are fat, at how you can confront and move past your own fat prejudice, and how you can help girls be fat with dignity and be healthy.  

The rest of the book provides skills to fight the body thieves and help girls reclaim their natural bodies and become physically active. The end of each chapter describes featured resources that you can incorporate into your daily life and practice. 

Fighting the Body Thieves addresses the basic elements of preventing eating disorders and promotes the concept of Health at Every Size. It addresses the conflicting messages that girls receive about their relationship to food, weight and body size. For example, we discourage girls from dieting, try to normalize their relationship with food and encourage them to accept their bodies at whatever size there are—unless they are fat. Then we encourage girls to diet and to accept their bodies only when these bodies become thin. The concept of ‘childhood obesity’ is a medical term that places the emphasis on fat and reinforces society’s belief that fat is bad—and therefore people who are fat are bad. This book focuses on promoting and sustaining healthy development and encouraging girls to become and remain physically active as they grow up. If girls are healthy and use their bodies then it doesn’t really matter what size they are.  

Translating Fat Talk teaches about the grungies—a term coined to describe the negative voice (such as feeling fat) that girls develop. It provides skills to help girls become aware of their grungies and to tell the stories that lie underneath. It teaches how to help girls express their feelings in a constructive way and how to talk to the other person in such a way that he or she will be receptive.  

Celebrating Girls’ Bodies looks at body image and provides body awareness skills as well as ways to diffuse the power of appearance. 

Getting Girls Off Diets looks at what happens when we diet, and provides us with the skills to get off our own. 

Food, Glorious Food looks at how girls can normalize their relationship to food.  

Becoming Physically Active looks at the benefits of physical activity and the barriers that stand in the way of girls’ participation. It describes the experiences of girls of different ages with physical education and provides strategies to make classes more relevant and girl friendly. It addresses after-school activities and the roles of community centers and parents. 

Participating in Sport look at how girls can take charge of their bodies by using them. It provides a basic understanding of gender equity and the ongoing struggle girls and women engage in. It addresses organized sports and the question of competition. It provides skills and strategies for parents and for coaches. 

Media provides tools for media literacy and activism. 

The last chapter With Determination and Courage looks at where we go from here.
 

"Some people never disappoint us, consistently stepping up to the challenge of making the world a safer place for girls. Sandra Friedman is at the top of that list. She continues to develop innovative and comprehensive programs to promote positive body image, self-esteem and identity, and to build resilience and resistance to the many factors that endanger girls' health and contribute to eating disorders. An outstanding resource for parents, professionals and for girls themselves, Body Thieves is her fourth and most recent work. Once again she has managed to integrate sophisticated feminist theory with practical, real-life examples, elucidating the many causes of these problems and suggesting new strategies to effect change. Like her previous works, this is a 'must have' for anyone involved in the prevention of eating disorders and in health promotion for girls."

Dr. Margo Maine

Excerpt from her book review

Journal of Eating Disorders Treatment and Prevention, 11:155-158, 2003

 

"This information has been personally helpful to me as a parent. I also plan to use some of it in a community group—especially the emphasis on physical activity."

Workshop participant, Athabasca, Alberta

"This is a valuable, important and useful book both in terms of practical advice and also of consciousness raising. It certainly raised my awareness of these particular issues and provided me with information I will use as my daughter undergoes the perilous journey though adolescence.

The writing is easy to read and the tone beautifully balanced—making it warm and approachable—but also very professional. Its particular strength is that Sandra Friedman shows how the Body Thieves steal the souls and spirits of all our girls, even those who never approach having an eating disorder."

Lynn Sackville, Vancouver, British Columbia
 

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